Acupuncture = voodoo?

Way back in December, we were playing kickball on the last night of derby practice.  It just so happened that Ruthie fell and bruised the inside of her kneecap in the process.  After two months’ rest, she finally went to the physio*, who fussed at her for not having come earlier, and ultimately told her she needed sever restriction of movement in the knee combined with some stretches for the muscles around the knee, to heal up.  It’s one of those injuries where there’s not a lot of blood flow in the area, so healing time is significantly increased.  Ignoring the rest order only exacerbates inflammation.  However, the issue quickly presented itself that in order to severely limit movement to the knee, she’d be losing all attempt at cardio [even copious amounts of walking inflame the knee].  Presented with this conundrum, the physio said she could go swimming with a pool buoy, to which she’s begun doing. 

In the mean time, we’ve also begun to seek out alternative methods of treatment.  Australia, or at least Melbourne, presents an interesting opportunity for us in situations like these because there is a really big blend of eastern and western medicine available.  Being friends with some really sporty people helps in that we know some people who have had to recover from injuries in order to keep performing, and it was through one of these friends that we were referred to an acupuncturist, with the recommendation to also look into dry needling.  Now, I’m fairly sceptical, about needles accessing my qi, and changing the flow of my energy.  But, I’m willing to have an open mind.  In fact, I’m actually eager for my mind to be changed, and in particular because both of us really want Ruthie to be able to skate [and thus bout] for the remainder of our time here.

Ruthie’s been tasked with making an appointment, and so we’ll see what happens.

*Physio, short for physiotherapist, which, as far as we can tell, is a physical therapist, but a bit better/more knowledgeable.  For example the physio that we have on our derby team went to school for eight years.  The only thing that would match that in the US is a Doctor of Physical Therapy [to the best of my limited knowledge].

Learning Aussie lingo

Updated 07 March 2013

For starters, there are a couple general rules when attempting to understand the local Australian. 

1. They don’t really pronounce ‘r’ sounds. 

2. They often over pronounce the ‘h’ sound. 

3. There’s something weird [as in neither Ruthie nor I are capable of reproducing it] about how they pronounce their ‘long o’ sounds.

4. They tend to shorten everything. 

4b. After shortening something, they tend to add an ‘o’ or ‘ie’ / ‘y’ sound to the end – even if that means the word is as long as or longer than the original. 

With that said, here’s a list of local diction I’ve had to learn to understand.  Ruthie and I have tried not to pick up too many of their speech patterns, but it’s happening slowly.  Ruthie tries her best to speak like an American claiming their pronunciations are stupid.  I try not to shove that in their faces so much, so maybe it’s no surprise that a couple words have slipped into my vocab.

ambo = ambulance or ambulance driver

arse = ass

arvo = afternoon

barbie = barbeque

bikie = motorcycle rider
bloke = dude [while sheila is the female counter term, I’ve not actually heard it used]

bogan = redneck mixed with a little bit of white trash

brekky = breakfast
chocka/chockers/chockablock = full, with emphasis on the extremely full side – chockablock full, while redundant would imply it’s going to explode

crack the shits[or crack it, if you prefer the less profane option] = get angry/have a tantrum, as in if you “crack it at Joe” you’re likely telling them off, or if simply “crack the shits” you’re throwing a hissy fit

degustation = while a real word, I’d never heard it until coming here

devo = devastated

feral = again, a legitimate word, but used more to describe someone who’s a bit crazy, and more commonly used to describe children who aren’t being angels.  Ruthie and I are particularly fond of this adjective for ankle biters. 

dickhead = idiot

from = at or starting, but only in the sense of “I’ll be back at my desk from 9a” or, “the show starts at 6p” would be shortened to “on from 6p”

look = a very common phrase starter – most recently I heard an interview where the person started every sentence with “Look” instead of things like “Um” or “Uh” or “Well” or  “Y’know” – but I’ve found it often has just a slightly less offensive implication than “Hey! What I’m about to say is important”

ordinary = instead of being used to describe “normal” there is a negative connotation; for example: in used to describe a day that was chilly, rainy, and not all that pleasant “The weather’s a bit ordinary today, isn’t it?”

lollies = generic term for candy, as opposed to multiple lollipops

Maccas = McDonald’s restaurant

mate = dude [or dudette, but primarily dude]

Pom/pommy = prisoner of her majesty, Brits living here

ranga = red head

rego = vehicle registration

rock up = to arrive, to show up

root = intercourse, along the lines of the slang meaning of “screw”

sandbo = sandwich

serve, a = used as a noun, piece of your mind, as in “He got on my last nerve, so I gave him a serve”

squiz = look at, as in “Let me have a squiz at my calendar.”

suss = suspect, as in “That’s a bit suss” = “That seems a bit suspect”

thongs = flip flops

totes = totally

trackies = literally track suit, but to Americans, it would be more of sweats – or anything with an elastic waistband

trackie dacks = track/sweat pants

tradie = tradesman or construction worker

unco = uncoordinated

whinge = complain, whine

_____ as = [i.e. “sweet as” “hot as”] basically, it’s the shortening of likening something to something else [“today is as hot as standing in a fire”]. 

So while I might’ve managed to pick up a term or two, Ruthie’s informed me that the most noticeable difference is my speech pattern’s changed a bit.  The locals have a tendency to end their sentences with a slight upswing in tone, and apparently that’s what I’ve adopted lately. 

It’s probably worth it to note, that at this point, the one word I haven’t been able to actually pick up is “mate”.  It just sounds so weird coming out of my mouth that even I don’t like it.  Conversely, “dickhead” is my current favourite slur.

-EP

Update 13 Jan 13:

So we were gifted with an Aussie lingo dictionary for Christmas.  Which is great!  Upon reading a few entries, we learned that even some of the Aussies that gave us the book hadn’t heard these terms.  So I’m guessing some are really quite obscure.  I might pick a few to post up at some point, but for now, we’re enjoying the fact that we’ve got some reference material when necessary.

 

I'm a slacker

Man, I am so far behind.  I feel like so many things have or might have happened, and I’ve got such a back log – mental constipation, if you will.  It certainly wasn’t my intention to leave TFAB this neglected for this long, but … well, honestly I don’t have any good excuses.  But here are some anyways:

A. My dog ate my homework.

B. I forgot how to read.

C. I’m lost in translation.

D. I was a dummy and thought if I waited long enough, Ruthie might actually dust this thing off.

E. I’ve been too busy.

F. I’ve been too busy at work which is when I have written several previous posts, and haven’t made the time to write anything while at home. 

For what it’s worth, I’m months behind in uploading my photos to FB, too.  Unfortunately, those don’t require as many words or digging through my memories to see what I thought about as it happened “Hey, I should write about that.” 

So, in attempt to force myself to get some things down on paper, I’m making myself a list.  [Apparently I’m on a list kick.  I’ve made myself a few at work, and I even gave Ruthie a honey-do list on Monday – much to her dismay, I’m sure.]

1. Update this blog again soon.

2. Update this blog again soon about one of the following things:

α. The mental list I’ve been attempting to build of Australian lingo and vocabulary.

β. Recap adventures with SueSue.  The trip to the Whitsundays might need it’s own post.

γ. Ramble on about the weather again [it truly is a country in which you can talk about the weather].

δ. It’s official: I’m an international goal scorer.  Although it seems that the days I score a goal we lose by quite a bit. 

ε. Despite my best efforts I’ve been informed I’m a bicyclist. 

ζ. More derby. 

3. Don’t let this blog wither and die [like our poor dried up aloe plant].

-EP

Noaaauuuuuuwwh

One of the frequent topics of conversation before I left for Oz was how much my diction and/or accent might or might not change.  I would have to say that I am much more easily influenced by the language of those around me.  I find new words and phrases novel and try to incorporate them into my speech.  Or at least that’s how I used to be before I came here.  Suddenly I am the one with the accents and using the funny words [or so they tell me – I think they’re all weird], and so I now find myself trying much harder to not integrate all the local colloquialisms into my regular speech.  Well, that’s not entirely true – I suppose it’s more that I’m attempting to be much more selective on what I integrate.  My actual pronunciations, on the other hand, are a battle that I refuse to let go. 

So far, I’ve only faltered twice on pronunciations and phrases that I find are silly, and they’ve just happened out of my mouth before I could stop it.  The first was the pronunciation of “banana” – they make all their a’s sound like the sheep’s sound: baaa.  The second was the common greeting, “how ya goin’”.  I refuse to acknowledge this as an acceptable greeting.  I can’t even logic how you get that set of words to make sense.  But, to my horror, the other day, I was busy meeting a lot of locals, and after the 59^th new person, and hearing “How ya goin?” 42 times in rapid succession, I greeted the 60^th person with that silly phrase and caught myself aghast. 

But with those two instances, I’ve been doing pretty well to be selective.  “Bogan” is a their term for “redneck”, except as far as I can tell a bogan is a redneck with a sprinkling of douchebag.  I’ve been trying to learn all the slang, derogatory terms for redheads to harass Shane, but so far all I can remember is “ranga” and “bluey”.  “Ginger” is apparently quite mild, and “ranga” is the next step up.  “Bluey” just happens to be another mild term that seems to fit Aussie sense of humour, so to me it’s a whatever term.  Pronunciation-wise, “Melbourne” is pronounced “melbun” and as only one syllable.  And most glaring is the way they say “know” and all its homonyms.  I don’t even know how to attempt to type out how their “no”s sound … there might be a u or even an umlaut in there and it's at least three syllables long. 

There are probably a few others, but at the moment, I’m drawing a blank.  If I find any particular gems, I’ll have to write them down for this thing.

-EP